At the risk of sounding like TST's new Quay. How do you guys get over girls? - TriStateTuners.com :: Home of Tristate Auto Enthusiast

Drftpretty · 03-29-2009, 08:13 PM

Flame suit is on lol.

To sum up a long ass story, The GF kept talking about getting married and 2 weeks ago whilst she was on vacation in Hawaii I decided to buy a wedding ring for her.

I had some guilt in my heart because (get ready for it) I cheated on her two years ago. Yup, I know Im a retard. I had to admit to her what I had done before I could propose to her guilt free.

I figured I would ask some real men how they deal with this sort of thing.

Hope that doesnt sound uber homo when read off the internet

Deusche bag comments really arent needed. So it would be great to avoid those. Thanks.

ho1ywars · 03-29-2009, 08:19 PM

give it time, shell realize whats good and come back if it was that special. If she was talking about getting married you were doing something right. give her a few to cool.

The Captain · 03-29-2009, 08:19 PM

What are you trying to do? Just get over her?

Delete her number, get rid of anything that reminds you of her, don't talk to her, don't try to be friends, just cut yourself off from her completely.

Get your dudes together and get out there and meet someone new.

It sucks for the first little while, but eventually it gets really easy.

russiankid · 03-29-2009, 08:19 PM

I think the reason she reacted the way she did is because she trusted you for for 3 years, and then she comes to find out you cheated on her. There really isn't a real way to get over things like this. Everyone reacts differently and gets over it differently. Only advice I can give you is don't turn to drugs or alcohol. They won't solve your problems, they will only relieve you for the time being.

Scapegoat · 03-29-2009, 08:20 PM

drink booze?

i think in this case you did the wrong thing by coming clean... there was no reason to rock the boat. It was pretty selfish as well :-/

Sorry Aaron...

To get over her?... hang out with friends and family... meet new chicks.

**TROLL** · 03-29-2009, 08:21 PM

Do you want to forget about her, or do you want to work on fixing things? Might take some time but you need to give her a reason to believe she can trust you and that she should give it another try. Persistence is key...

c0nfl1kt · 03-29-2009, 08:24 PM

To get over her just work a lot and randomly hook up on the weekends.

**TROLL** · 03-29-2009, 08:26 PM

2 weeks ago you bought an engagement ring, I find it hard to believe that you want to get over her now... just slow down and the rational thinking will come back sooner or later...

Drftpretty · 03-29-2009, 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scapegoat

drink booze?

i think in this case you did the wrong thing by coming clean... there was no reason to rock the boat. It was pretty selfish as well :-/

Sorry Aaron...

To get over her?... hang out with friends and family... meet new chicks.

Thanks guys, this is what I needed.

I just know I havent been the best BF in the world and thought this was going to be the right thing to do.

Apparently, the entire family thinks I was just trying to make everyone turn against her

Its like I cant win no matter what I do.

I just need to stop thinking about her, she was living with me and now that she is gone everything is empty. The walls, the drawers, the toy boxes. It feels like I lost my wife and son.

For the first time I have no desire to hook-up. Theres just no motivation to even look at another girl. I just want to hear her voice happy again.

Spocknasty · 03-29-2009, 08:30 PM

Just take it day by day. Take out the negative feelings through working out or doing something productive.

Don't listen to everyone who says to rush out after new girls, just clear your head first and feel better through bettering yourself.

If anything that makes yourself better in the long run, if she comes back to you or not.

ThePrimerSuspect · 03-29-2009, 08:31 PM

me, i drank myself into oblivion every single night for a good 2 months. pretty much only slept at work, or woke up in my truck in random places. but hey, it worked. i have no regrets. and i had a great ****ing time for a few months. i strongly recommend it

Drftpretty · 03-29-2009, 08:34 PM

Not to mention by bro left for the navy last week, the house is empty. My dad cant be trusted to change his oil, I really just really thought she was the one and that I could confess and we would be stronger.

Spocknasty · 03-29-2009, 08:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Drftpretty

My dad cant be trusted to change his oil, I really just really thought she was the one and that I could confess and we would be stronger.

Not to be an ass, but what does your dad's inabilities have to do with the relationship?

agoodall · 03-29-2009, 08:36 PM

the truth shall set you free from the guilt of cheating on her, not set you free from losing her. Time heals all wounds kick back and enjoy your new unwanted freedom and if you want her back...chances are you have a long treacherous road ahead of you good luck

Scapegoat · 03-29-2009, 08:39 PM

first mistake was relying on church stuff... haha

I'm not really sure what to tell ya man... i've never been into a girl to the point i thought marriage was going to happen...

I guess, give her some time... see if things change. After all, its been a few years since you let the deal go down

Drftpretty · 03-29-2009, 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CRXed

Not to be an ass, but what does your dad's inabilities have to do with the relationship?

I couldnt go to him for any advice at all, my brother is gone, and so I was left with her step dad who is a cool guy and knows her and her son. I figured it would help.

Spocknasty · 03-29-2009, 08:46 PM

The advice people give isn't going to change how you feel. Just get in touch with yourself man, work on your flaws, and ride it out. It's gonna take time. Hit me up if you need someone to talk to.

215ek · 03-29-2009, 09:07 PM

hang out with good supportive friends/drink too much/ let her cool down and try again, if thats what your hoping for

crazyukrainian · 03-29-2009, 09:20 PM

it takes guts to admit faults, even more to try to change them.... she might be overreacting or she might be just stupid, i dont know. but if she has it set in her mind that she wants nothing to do with you, then that's the way she's gonna live her life.....

try talking to her, maybe her dad too..... if its done then just live your life, concentrate on work if anything, or pick up a hobby; if shes not coming back you need to distract yourself with something (project car maybe? :P)

Drftpretty · 03-29-2009, 09:28 PM

^Thats insane you say that. I was surfing CL looking for a 50 some to flat black, slam, and limo tint. No luck

03-29-2009, 08:19 PM	#3
The Captain Tri-State Post Whore Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: West Philly - FBG$ Member #3369 My Ride: Prelude iTrader: (2)	What are you trying to do? Just get over her? Delete her number, get rid of anything that reminds you of her, don't talk to her, don't try to be friends, just cut yourself off from her completely. Get your dudes together and get out there and meet someone new. It sucks for the first little while, but eventually it gets really easy. __________________ Thank you for flying Air force Airlines. Oh me? They call me The Captain. - "America is all about speed - hot, nasty bad-ass speed." Eleanor Roosevelt (1965)

03-29-2009, 08:19 PM	#4
russiankid Tri-State Post Whore Join Date: May 2008 Location: Lincoln University PA Member #7769 My Ride: 2012 Scion tC iTrader: (0)	I think the reason she reacted the way she did is because she trusted you for for 3 years, and then she comes to find out you cheated on her. There really isn't a real way to get over things like this. Everyone reacts differently and gets over it differently. Only advice I can give you is don't turn to drugs or alcohol. They won't solve your problems, they will only relieve you for the time being. __________________ 2012' Scion tC 6-speed M/T.

03-29-2009, 08:30 PM	#10
Spocknasty Meh Join Date: Oct 2005 Member #986 iTrader: (5)	Just take it day by day. Take out the negative feelings through working out or doing something productive. Don't listen to everyone who says to rush out after new girls, just clear your head first and feel better through bettering yourself. If anything that makes yourself better in the long run, if she comes back to you or not. __________________ formerly CRXed To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 signatures. I <3 JSC Speed and Liquid Powder Coats!

03-29-2009, 08:46 PM	#17
Spocknasty Meh Join Date: Oct 2005 Member #986 iTrader: (5)	The advice people give isn't going to change how you feel. Just get in touch with yourself man, work on your flaws, and ride it out. It's gonna take time. Hit me up if you need someone to talk to. __________________ formerly CRXed To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 signatures. I <3 JSC Speed and Liquid Powder Coats!

03-29-2009, 09:07 PM	#18
215ek Tri-State Post Whore Join Date: Sep 2008 Member #8604 My Ride: is rubbin, therefore its dubbin iTrader: (0)	hang out with good supportive friends/drink too much/ let her cool down and try again, if thats what your hoping for __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 signatures.

03-29-2009, 08:19 PM	#2
ho1ywars Tri-State Addict Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Ewing, New Jersey Member #282 My Ride: S14, EF, 600RR iTrader: (2)	give it time, shell realize whats good and come back if it was that special. If she was talking about getting married you were doing something right. give her a few to cool.

03-29-2009, 08:20 PM	#5
Scapegoat TST Ruined My Life! Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: stop looking at my gold Member #1208 iTrader: (1)	drink booze? i think in this case you did the wrong thing by coming clean... there was no reason to rock the boat. It was pretty selfish as well :-/ Sorry Aaron... To get over her?... hang out with friends and family... meet new chicks.

03-29-2009, 08:24 PM	#7
c0nfl1kt Tri-State Dictator Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Aberdeen Proving Ground, MD Member #10332 My Ride: Family car. iTrader: (1)	To get over her just work a lot and randomly hook up on the weekends.

03-29-2009, 08:31 PM	#11
ThePrimerSuspect Tri-State Addict Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: philly Member #1241 iTrader: (0)	me, i drank myself into oblivion every single night for a good 2 months. pretty much only slept at work, or woke up in my truck in random places. but hey, it worked. i have no regrets. and i had a great ****ing time for a few months. i strongly recommend it

03-29-2009, 08:39 PM	#15
Scapegoat TST Ruined My Life! Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: stop looking at my gold Member #1208 iTrader: (1)	first mistake was relying on church stuff... haha I'm not really sure what to tell ya man... i've never been into a girl to the point i thought marriage was going to happen... I guess, give her some time... see if things change. After all, its been a few years since you let the deal go down

03-29-2009, 09:20 PM	#19
crazyukrainian Tri-State Addict Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Philly/Warrington Member #8644 My Ride: 03 Avalon / 07 SV650S iTrader: (0)	it takes guts to admit faults, even more to try to change them.... she might be overreacting or she might be just stupid, i dont know. but if she has it set in her mind that she wants nothing to do with you, then that's the way she's gonna live her life..... try talking to her, maybe her dad too..... if its done then just live your life, concentrate on work if anything, or pick up a hobby; if shes not coming back you need to distract yourself with something (project car maybe? :P)

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