how to drive in NJ

[Mrjaydeeone]

How To Drive In NJ (Finally an easy-to read GUIDE for visitors!)

1. First, you must learn how to pronounce Newark ....It is New-erk, not New-ark. (Actually, it's pronounced 'NORK'.)

2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush hour is from noon to 7:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
3. The minimum acceptable speed on the turnpike is 85 mph. On the Garden State Parkway it's 105 or 110. Anything less is considered 'Wussy.'
4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Jersey has its own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires go second. However, in Monmouth County , SUV-driving, cell phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cussed out, and possibly shot.
6. Never honk at anyone. EVER. It's another offense that can get you shot.
7. Road construction is permanent and continuous in all of Jersey . Detour barrels are moved around for your entertainment during the middle of the night to make the next day's driving a bit 'more exciting'.
8. Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats, barrels, cones, celebs, rubber-neckers, shredded tires, cell-phoners, deer and other road kill, and the homeless feeding on any of these items.
9. Mapquest does not work here -- none of the roads are where they say they are or go where they say they do. And all the Turnpike EZ pass lanes are moved each night once again to make your ride more exciting.
10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally activated.'
11. If you are in the left lane and only driving 70 in a 55-65mph zone, you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off' accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
12. Do not try to estimate travel time -- just leave Monday afternoon for Tuesday appointments, by noon Thursday for Friday, and right after church on Sunday for anything on Monday morning.
Follow these simple tips and you should make it through the day alive in New Jersey ...

[SpEcRv9]

sums up my driving experience in jersey haha

[240_fun]

hahahahaha.....for real
I honked at some dude in PENNINGTON of all places and the asshole stopped and got out and tried to act all tough... it was on Dublin Rd for those who are familiar
I was like w/e move ur f***ing car...

hahaha....
Theres a reason its called 95!!!!
if ur not going 95 get ur ass outta my way!!!

OOOO and we have CIRCLES
have fun figuring those out if ur from outta state!!! :D

[Kerplunk105]

haha. good laughs.

[TheDocta]

awesome

its entirely true

especially about Monmouth county

[Yukkerz]

i hate nj

[EvlEgl]

And NJ Hates you.

I LOVE circles, I could probably park off to the side and watch the people who dunno hwo to navigate them drive like Complete morons all day...Its just funny for me.

[marshallpre1]

lol. I'm going down to Passaic, this Saturday in the Supra to visit this one shop... I would ahve to say CT has much worse drivers- not knowing that right lane is cruising and left is PASSING, switching lanes without signals, cutting you off when you are driving much faster than them... the list can go on and on.

[ThePrimerSuspect]

i live in northeast philly. same rules apply here

[Dave]

Originally Posted by EvlEgl

And NJ Hates you.

I LOVE circles, I could probably park off to the side and watch the people who dunno hwo to navigate them drive like Complete morons all day...Its just funny for me.

agreed, and we do. i hate driving in PA. nobody knows where they are going

[lasthope05]

Haha..I love it. Its so true. I lived in NJ for 2 years and driving over there blows.. Not to mention the cops.

[den9]

Originally Posted by ThePrimerSuspect

i live in northeast philly. same rules apply here

ne philly is no where as bad as nj.

u know jersey is bad when ur driving instructor tells the class she doesnt like to be prejudice but she hates nj drivers.

[SovXietday]

Lol, the best part about this is when you get a NJ driver in PA with a big hole of nothingness around them because PA drivers will not travel near them.

[jettamark]

haha so true, i love driving in jersey but the roads are not lowrider friendly

[Butercp5]

maybe you should lift your car up alittle i mean rubbin is cool and all but it cant be good for your car

[SpEcRv9]

Originally Posted by SovXietday

Lol, the best part about this is when you get a NJ driver in PA with a big hole of nothingness around them because PA drivers will not travel near them.

nj drivers in pa = its like theyve never seen roads that make sense...

[Dave]

Originally Posted by SpEcRv9

nj drivers in pa = its like theyve never seen roads that make sense...

can i buy pot from you?

[fastjim]

so true about jersey drivers.. i lived there for 2 years.. everyone is in a rush even to get to wawa which is one block from the house.. haha and talking about cops.. if you have Pa plates you better drive around manchester in order to get to toms river or seaside.. they will pull you over and give you a ridiculous ticket just cuz your from Pa.. believe me i do it monday-friday when i go to work.. haha yeah it adds like 10 mins to the drive but you can always check out the scenary in the woods.. haha