Rant about my office workers

[marshallpre1]

My ****ing job is unbelievable, I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:

First there is the supermodel wanna be chick. I'll give her credit she is pretty ****ing hot. But She's constantly fixing her hair or putting on make up. She is extremely self-centered and never considers the needs/want/desires of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, I'm surprised she has enough brain power to continue to breath. She must suck a mean dick, because the boss keeps her around.

The next chick is exactly the opposite. She is probably one of the smartest person on the planet. He career opportunities are endless, yet she is here with us. She is like a -10 on a scale of 1 to 10. I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves her 'womanly' parts. I think is a lesbian, every time we drive by a Home Depot she moans like she is creaming her panties.

Finally, the jewel of the crowd is this ****ing stoner. I'm not talking like an occasional toker. This guy is baked before he comes to work, during work and I'm sure after work. I would doubt that he has been 'sober' in the last 10 years easily. And he's only 22. He dresses like a freakin' beatnik throwback from the 1960's. To make it worse he brings his big ****ing dog to work. Every ****ing day I have to look at this HUGE ****ING DOG!! This thing usually walks around about 1/2 stoned from the 2nd hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think its trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Both of them are constantly hungry, require multiple stops at McDonalds and Burger King.

Anyways, I drive these ****tards around in my van and we solve mysteries and ****.