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Originally Posted by Snoozie
Since when is telling a child to eat their ****ing food an effective method for getting them to do so? I don't think that you should have to scare your child into doing what they're told. I know that my sisters and I were raised with a very heavy hand and it totally sucked. And I very much resented my parents because of it. I just think that you'd get a better result if you did it in a positive manner, much like dog training. lol
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No, then you get kids with a spoiled rotten sense of self entitlement and no discipline. It's just my opinion but I think the weak parenting is part of what's wrong with the US these days. You can't just be heavy handed, you have to be heavy handed selectively and with purpose, but I think it's a part of good parenting when applied responsibly.
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Originally Posted by Scapegoat
i'm not bartering with a child for good behavior. they're not going to get a treat if they eat their wendy's meal... that is the treat.
if they don't listen to a request to eat their food and stop playing with it... you raise your voice. if they continue to disobey you grab their little ungrateful ass, toss their food and leave and have a few choice words outside.
i'm not going to have a heavy hand. but i'm not going to barter with my children in such situations, i'm the adult. A child needs to be raised with a a healthy mix of fear and respect of their elders. obviously that entails positive reinforcement... but offering them a "treat" to be respectful when they're being disrespectful is only going to lead to reinforcing that it is ok to be disrespectful b/c they're going to get something good.
it's just like a dog... if it runs out into the street, you smack it till it learns not to do that b/c it's going to get smacked. it doesn't understand it'll get hit by a car, but it sure as hell will understand that it's going to get hurt by you if it runs off.
if it is doing a behavior you don't agree with, you have to give it a reason not to do it.
Jul, i'd have let the little ****er starve, he def would have went home hungry and i would have had a few words with the parents when they came complaining to me about the fat **** complaining about being hungry
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I don't plan to be quite that strict but I generally agree with this style of parenting. It's how I was brought up, and while it didn't help me much in my rebellious teenage years, I like to think that it formed who I am as an adult very well.
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Originally Posted by ~Brian~
I had something similar... it was an 8" wide board with a handle that my parents used. They took one of those tools used to burn things into wood and wrote on it: "We must learn to listen"...
Ah, those were the days.. haha
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Yeah, I was exposed to numerous harsh punishments from a stepfather. To the point that I think being told to eat your ****ing food and shutup isn't really a big deal. Ours wasn't 8 inches, it was much more narrow which meant it hurt more. It was also cleverly decorated. They bought it from the store. I forget what it said though. One choice experience I recall was that I wasn't eating my food... I don't know why, I was just full I guess. My step father decided I will eat and grabbed a shovel of green beans off my plate and put them in my mouth. I guess he pushed back too hard because it got my gag reflex and I vomited all over the table. It was great.