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close:
1.) No, there is nothing between us, we're just friends.
reality: I am humping the hell out of him behind your back.
2.) Its not you, its me.
reality: its you.
3.) I'm sorry.
reality: I'm sorry I got caught.
Runner up: No officer, I don't know how fast I was going.
-Cliff
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"Cliff, I find going fast neither exciting, nor enjoyable, please stop. No, I don't want to do smokey burnouts or donuts!" - My Mom on her first ride in the miata
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